The Way It Is

The Way It Is

Tom/B’Elanna, Star Trek: Voyager, R.  One-shot.  The very first fan fic I ever wrote from way back when I was like 16…  I couldn’t bring myself to get rid of this little piece.

Paramount owns all, blah blah blah.

It’s not like those shooting stars they talk about in romance novels, but it is beautiful without a doubt. It’s kind of like being sleepy and wide awake all at once, since your eyes squeeze shut but you couldn’t stop the rushing of your blood even if you stopped breathing. You’re aware of every sensation, the way his skin feels on yours, the way his scruffy chin leaves burns across your face, the way he rocks into you with those slow thrusts that take your breath away, because they’re gentle but desperate all at once. And you feel him, the way he’s just as close to losing it as you are, and you know that you’ll love every minute of it. Because he trusts you enough to lose it, to hold you without caring what anyone else would think.

And then it happens; your eyes snap open because you have to see, and you find him watching you with that funny expression of his that’s so close to pure joy. You would laugh then if you could get enough air to do so. You’re both sweaty now, but you don’t even care, because the shower you’ll share later is part of the fun.

Later, when you walk down the halls, past people who see you everyday, who work with you and know you, you wonder, don’t they see it? It’s so obvious to you, the way your skin is tingling still with that afterglow, the way his scent still invades your nostrils if you turn your head a certain way, and how you don’t care, because you love the invasion, and you breathe in deep if you catch even a whiff. Don’t they see the dumb grin that won’t get off your face and the spring to your step? Maybe they do, but they’re too polite to say anything.

Then there are those awkward mess hall moments, when you’re afraid to meet his gaze because you just know everyone will see the pure desire that will spark between you as if it were physically woven into the air. You’re so aware of every little movement you make and how he watches you as you catch your food with your fork and lift it to your lips, and you know what he’s thinking when you do that. And your thoughts go back too, to the way you used your mouth to make his open with a groan. And you smile, because you love how you know each other so well, with just the smallest of glances.

So with a flick of your tongue you tease him, and give him the smallest of promises that he’ll know the way it is again, soon enough. His hand traces the edge of your thigh under the table, and you let your eyes close as you feel the memories of the night before rush back with just that tiny prompting. And you want him to stop, because you know you canÕt prevent the vulnerability of the moment, but you want him to go on because you know he would never take advantage of such a thing.

“Carey to Torres.” Reality snaps you back, as always, and you pull yourself away from your tempter to give a quick reply.

“Torres here.” You’re almost guilty about him, hoping that your lieutenant won’t notice your shortness of breath, and you let your gaze flick over to where he’s innocently finishing his lunch.

“Seven’s finished her specs for the new Engineering/Astrometrics interface and they check out so far as I could tell; should I tell her to go ahead with it?”

“I’m on my way; tell Seven to put a hold on it until I get there.”

You stand up, tossing your napkin onto the table with a sigh. You look at him one more time before you go, but then change your mind and lean down to give him a brief kiss. “Later,” you whisper against his mouth as an incentive, and you hear him catch his breath as you turn around and stride out of the mess hall.

And on the way out, you smile to yourself, because you can hardly wait.

=^=